X-NEWS: spcvxb.spc.edu rec.humor.funny: 6608 Xref: spcuna rec.humor.funny:6608 Newsgroups: rec.humor.funny From: alan@cymru.net (Alan Cox) Subject: Picking Logos - or how to describe a penguin Keywords: smirk Approved: funny-request@clari.net Path: spcuna!news.new-york.net!news.wctc.net!chi-news.cic.net!newsspool.doit.wisc.edu!night.primate.wisc.edu!sdd.hp.com!elroy.jpl.nasa.gov!swrinde!howland.reston.ans.net!vixen.cso.uiuc.edu!cdc2.cdc.net!news.texas.net!nntp.primenet.com!uunet!in2.uu.net!fugue.clari.net!funny-request Message-ID: Date: Wed, 5 Jun 96 19:30:01 EDT Lines: 53 The Linux community have been trying to get the 'perfect' penguin logo for a week or so now. Various things have been battered around and Linus finally came up with this spec for the penguin he wanted: > Now, when you think about penguins, first take a deep calming breath, and > then think "cuddly". Take another breath, and think "cute". Go back to > "cuddly" for a while (and go on breathing), then think "contented". > > With me so far? Good.. > > Now, with penguins, (cuddly such), "contented" means it has either just > gotten laid, or it's stuffed on herring. Take it from me, I'm an expert on > penguins, those are really the only two options. > > Now, working on that angle, we don't really want to be associated with a > randy penguin (well, we do, but it's not politic, so we won't), so we > should be looking at the "stuffed to its brim with herring" angle here. > > So when you think "penguin", you should be imagining a slighly overweight > penguin (*), sitting down after having gorged itself, and having just burped. > It's sitting there with a beatific smile - the world is a good place to be > when you have just eaten a few gallons of raw fish and you can feel another > "burp" coming. > > (*) Not FAT, but you should be able to see that it's sitting down because > it's really too stuffed to stand up. Think "bean bag" here. > > Now, if you have problems associating yourself with something that gets > off by eating raw fish, think "chocolate" or something, but you get the > idea. > > Ok, so we should be thinking of a lovable, cuddly, stuffed penguin > sitting down after having gorged itself on herring. Still with me? > > NOW comes the hard part. With this image firmly etched on your eyeballs, you > then scetch a stylizied version of it. Not a lot of detail - just a black > brush-type outline (you know the effect you get with a brush where the > thickness of the line varies). THAT requires talent. Give people the > outline, and they should say [ sickly sweet voice, babytalk almost ]"Ooh, > what a cuddly penguin, I bet he is just _stuffed_ with herring", and small > children will jump up and down and scream "mommy mommy, can I have one too?". > (of course I'm not sure why small children want herring) [From torvalds@cs.helsinki.fi, reproduced with his permission] -- Selected by Jim Griffith. MAIL your joke to funny@clari.net. Attribute the joke's source if at all possible. A Daemon will auto-reply. Remember: Only ONE joke per submission. Extra jokes may be rejected. For the full submission guidelines, see http://comedy.clari.net/rhf/