X-NEWS: spcvxb alt.sex: 60336 Relay-Version: VMS News - V6.0-3 14/03/90 VAX/VMS V5.5; site spcvxb.spc.edu Path: spcvxb.spc.edu!rutgers!cmcl2!psinntp!psinntp!digex!sasqatch Newsgroups: alt.sex Subject: NEW *** Purity and Impropriety Test *** (part 2/2) Message-ID: <1992Jul1.145328.5182@access.digex.com> From: sasqatch@access.digex.com (Ralph E. Nelson) Date: 1 Jul 92 14:53:28 GMT References: <1992Jul1.145026.5053@access.digex.com> Organization: Express Access Online Communications, Greenbelt, MD USA Keywords: purity test 800 new half Lines: 530 [continued from last post] ------------------------------------------- Section VIII. It's Gwendolyn Time! [32/6] Have you ever: 435. Do you consider Bondage a way of showing that you care for someone? 436. Do you know what a 'safeword' is (and have one or more of your own)? 437. improvised bondage extemporaneously during sexual activity (i.e. holding someone's wrists over their head)? 438. practiced asphyxia (trying to heighten sexual pleasure through semi-suffocation)? 439. been tied up for erotic purposes (ropes, scarves, ties)? *** [1/2 pt] if you answered 'Yes' would you do it again If 'No' have you considered doing so? 440. been tied up and fucked? 441. been tied up and masturbated upon? 442. been tied up and had to watch others? 443. been tied up knowing you might be seen by others? *** [1/2 pt] fantasized of being tied up for erotic purposes? *** [1/2 pt] fantasized of tying someone up for erotic purposes? *** [1/2 pt] fantasized of tying someone up to show them to others? *** [1/2 pt] fantasized of tying someone up to have them watch others? 444. willingly had your head inserted in a toilet bowl? 445. inserted someone's head in a toilet bowl with their consent or acquiescence? 446. tied someone up for erotic purposes? *** [1/2 pt] if you answered 'Yes' would you do it again If 'No' have you considered doing so? 447. tied someone up and fucked them? 448. tied someone up and masturbated on them? 449. tied someone up and had them watch? 450. tied someone up and shown them to others? 451. been bound in chains (handcuffs, leg irons or plain chain)? 452. been bound and had someone whip you? 453. been whipped until you bled? 454. had your nipples pierced? 455. had your nether lips pierced (or penis)? 456. pierced someone else's nipples? 457. pierced someone else's nether lips (or penis)? 458. bound someone in chains (handcuffs, leg irons or plain chain)? 459. bound someone and whipped them? 460. whipped someone until they bled? 461. bought bondage & discipline literature? 462. read "The Story of O"? 463. read both volumes of "The Story of O"? 464. seen the movie "The Story of O"? 465. posed for B&D drawings/photographs/movies? 466. asked someone to pose for B&D drawings/photographs/movies? Section IX. Non Platonic Activities. (The Steamy Part). [70/0] Have you ever done the following with a MALE: 467. been propositioned by a man for necking or petting? 468. been propositioned by a man for any sexual practice? 469. been pinched or patted on the buttocks by a man? 470. been kissed by a man below the neck, but not on the hands and arms? 471. received a hickey from a man (or had the attempt if hard to get)? 472. received a hickey from a man in an intimate location? 473. received scratch marks or nail marks from a man? 474. been bitten or nibbled upon by him? 475. been bitten by him in an intimate location? 476. had a man fondled or stroked your clothed legs? 477. had a man stroke or fondle your clothed breast or nipples? 478. had a man pet/stroke/fondle/otherwise handle your covered genitals? 479. had a man fondled or stroked your bare legs? 480. had a man stroke or fondle your bare breast or nipples? 481. had a man pet/stroke/fondle/otherwise handle your bare genitals? 482. propositioned a man for necking or petting? 483. propositioned a man for any sexual practice? 484. pinched or patted a man's buttocks? 485. kissed a man below the neck, but not on the hands and arms? 486. given a hickey (or had the attempt if hard to get) to a man? 487. given a hickey in an intimate location to a man? 488. petted a man above or below the waist? 489. left scratches or nail marks on a man? 490. left teeth marks on a man? 491. left teeth marks in an intimate location on a man? 492. fondled or stroked a man's clothed legs? 493. stroked or fondled a man's clothed breast or nipple? 494. petted/stroked/fondled/otherwise handled a man's covered genitals? 495. fondled or stroked a man's bare legs? 496. stroked or fondled a man's bare breast or nipple? 497. petted/stroked/fondled/otherwise handled a man's bare genitals? 498. been involved with pelvic thrusting with a man while clothed? 499. had you fingers licked or sucked by a man? 500. licked or sucked a man's fingers? 501. had your ear/ear region licked/breathed on/sucked/nibbled by a man? 502. licked/breathed on/sucked/nibbled a man's ear/ear region? 503. fondled a man who was asleep? 504. woken up being fondled by a man? 505. had sex with a man who was asleep? 506. slept through sexual activity (him doing it to you)? 507. woken up in the midst of a man having sexual activity with you? 508. given a man a backrub or massage with ulterior motives? 509. given a man a backrub or massage with ulterior motives, and it worked? 510. been petted to orgasm by a man? 511. petted a man to orgasm? 512. performed fellatio ("oral stimulation of the penis" Webster)? 513. received fellatio? 514. performed mutual oral sex ('69') with a man? 515. performed mutual masturbation with a man? 516. watched while a man masturbated? 517. had a man watch while you masturbated? 518. orgasmed in or on him? 519. had him orgasm in or on you? 520. kissed a man (or boy) on a first date? 521. necked or petted with a man (or boy) on a first date? 522. received oral sex from a man on a first date? 523. given oral sex to a man on a first date? 524. fucked a man on a first date? [continued on next page] Section IX. Non Platonic Activities. [continued] 525. had oral sex with a man instead of intercourse with him? 526. gotten so involved in foreplay that you and/or he forgot about/ran out of time for sex? 527. been seen naked under good lighting by a man (note: nude is expected (i.e. in a shower room or at a nude beach), naked is when you didn't expect to be seen (i.e. in the bathroom).)? 528. seen a man naked under good lighting? 529. undressed under good lighting, knowing a man was watching you? 530. been in a man's company while both of you were nude without anything steamy happening? 531. bathed or showered with a man? 532. let a man wash you when you were perfectly capable of doing so yourself? 533. washed a man who was perfectly capable of washing himself? 534. had sex with a man while in the shower? 535. had sex with a man while taking a bath? 536. "seduced" a virgin male? Section X. Son (or daughter) of Steamy Part. [70/0] Have you ever done the following with a FEMALE: 537. been propositioned by a woman for necking or petting? 538. been propositioned by a woman for any sexual practice? 539. been pinched or patted on the buttocks by a woman? 540. been kissed by a woman below the neck, but not on the hands and arms? 541. received a hickey from a woman (or had the attempt if hard to get)? 542. received a hickey from a woman in an intimate location? 543. received scratch marks or nail marks from a woman? 544. been nibbled or bitten by her? 545. been nibbled or bitten by her in an intimate location? 546. had a woman fondled or stroked your clothed legs? 547. had a woman stroke or fondle your clothed breast or nipples? 548. had a woman pet/stroke/fondle/otherwise handle your covered genitals? 549. had a woman fondled or stroked your bare legs? 550. had a woman stroke or fondle your bare breast or nipples? 551. had a woman pet/stroke/fondle/otherwise handle your bare genitals? 552. propositioned a woman for necking or petting? 553. propositioned a woman for any sexual practice? 554. pinched or patted a woman's buttocks? 555. kissed a woman below the neck, but not on the hands and arms? 556. given a hickey to a woman (or had the attempt if hard to get)? 557. given a hickey to a woman in an intimate location? 558. petted a woman above or below the waist? 559. left scratches or nail marks on her? 560. left teeth marks on her? 561. left teeth marks on her in an intimate location? [continued on next page] Section X. Son (or daughter) of Steamy Part. [continued] 562. fondled or stroked a woman's clothed legs? 563. stroked or fondled a woman's clothed breast or nipple? 564. petted/stroked/fondled/otherwise handled a woman's covered genitals? 565. fondled or stroked a woman's bare legs? 566. stroked or fondled a woman's bare breast or nipple? 567. petted/stroked/fondled/otherwise handled a woman's bare genitals? 568. been involved with pelvic thrusting with a woman while clothed? 569. had you fingers licked or sucked by a woman? 570. licked or sucked a woman's fingers? 571. had your ear/ear region licked/breathed on/sucked/nibbled by a woman? 572. licked/breathed on/sucked/nibbled a woman's ear? 573. fondled a woman who was asleep? 574. woken up being fondled by a woman? 575. had sex with a woman who was asleep? 576. slept through sexual activity (her doing it to you)? 577. woken up in the midst of a woman having sexual activity with you? 578. given a woman a backrub or massage with ulterior motives? 579. given a woman a backrub or massage with ulterior motives, and had it worked? 580. been petted to orgasm by a woman? 581. petted a woman to orgasm? 582. performed cunnilingus ("oral stimulation of the vulva or clitoris")? 583. received cunnilingus? 584. been involved in mutual oral sex ('69') with a woman? 585. been involved in mutual masturbation with a woman? 586. watched while a woman masturbated? 587. had a woman watch while you masturbated? 588. orgasmed in or on her? 589. had her orgasm on you? 590. kissed a woman (or girl) on a first date? 591. necked or petted with a woman (or girl) on a first date? 592. received oral sex from a woman on a first date? 593. given oral sex to a woman on a first date? 594. fucked a woman on a first date? 595. had oral sex with a woman instead of intercourse with her? 596. gotten so involved in foreplay that you and/or she forgot about/ran out of time for sex? 597. been seen naked under good lighting by a woman (note: nude is expected (i.e. in a shower room or at a nude beach), naked is when you didn't expect to be seen (i.e. in the bathroom).)? 598. seen a woman naked under good lighting? 599. undressed under good lighting, knowing a woman was watching you? 590. been in a woman's company while both of you were nude without anything steamy happening? 591. bathed or showered with a woman (non-coed facilities don't count)? 602. let a woman wash you when you were perfectly capable of doing so yourself? 603. washed a woman who was perfectly capable of washing herself? 604. had sex with a woman while in the shower? 605. had sex with a woman while taking a bath? 606. "seduced" a virgin female? Section XI. Locality. [92/0] "Have you done it on a plane; Have you done it on a train? (with apologies to Have you done it in your bed; Dr. Suess) Have you done it on your head? Have you, have you... with green eggs and ham?" Have you ever: 607. had phone sex (not commercial; your partner can't come over tonight so Ma Bell is the intermediary)? 608. had electronic mail/chat/etc. sex (used dataline rather than voice)? 609. been involved in hot tubbing (jacuzzi or hydropool) where someone (or more than one) was convinced to removed clothing after getting in? 610. hot tubbed in the nude (jacuzzi or hydropool)? 611. hot tubbed in mixed company? 612. hot tubbed in the nude in mixed company? 613. while hot tubbing, been groped or groped someone else under the water? 614. while hot tubbing, necked or petted? 615. while hot tubbing, had oral sex? 616. while hot tubbing, fucked? 617. saunaed or steam bathed in mixed company? 618. saunaed or steam bathed in the nude? 619. saunaed or steam bathed in the nude in mixed company? 620. while in a sauna or steam bath, ever necked or petted? 621. while in a sauna or steam bath, had oral sex? 622. while in a sauna or steam bath, fucked? 623. necked or petted in a place of religion? 624. had oral sex in a place of religion? 625. fucked in a place of religion? 626. necked or petted in a place of the dead (morgue, cemetery, mortuary, crypt, hearse, or coffin)? 627. had oral sex in a place of the dead? 628. fucked in a place of the dead? 629. necked or petted in a theatre during the show (you need not be affiliated with the production of the show for this to count)? 630. had oral sex in a theatre during the show? 631. fucked in a theatre during the show? 632. necked or petted in a sports or theatrical area (arena, stadium, court, track, ballfield, catwalk, between curtains, or orchestra pit)? 633. had oral sex in a sports or theatrical area? 634. fucked in a sports or theatrical area? 635. in a vehicle of not more than 3000 pounds GWT (a car, station wagon, light pickup), necked/petted? 636. in a vehicle <=3000 pounds GWT, had oral sex? 637. in a vehicle <=3000 pounds GWT, fucked? 638. in a vehicle >3000 pounds GWT (van, pickup), necked/petted? 639. in a vehicle >3000 pounds GWT, had oral sex? 640. in a vehicle >3000 pounds GWT, fucked? 641. in a vehicle >10000 pounds GWT (semi, RV) necked/petted? 642. in a vehicle >10000 pounds GWT had oral sex? 643. in a vehicle >10000 pounds GWT fucked? 644. necked/petted with the operator of a moving vehicle (any size)? 645. had oral sex with the operator of a moving vehicle? 646. fucked the operator of a moving vehicle? 647. as the operator of a moving vehicle, necked/petted? 648. as the operator of a moving vehicle, received oral sex? 649. as the operator of a moving vehicle, fucked? 650. necked/petted on horseback (just don't scare the horses)? 651. had oral sex on horseback? 652. fucked on horseback? [continued on next page] Section XI. Locality. [continued] 653. had sex at a public event (such as a rock concert, rally, or riot)? 654. necked/petted on a train? 655. had oral sex on a train? 656. fucked on a train? 657. necked/petted on a boat (for purposes of this test, a boat is any water based craft under 80 feet in length)? 658. had oral sex on a boat? 659. fucked on a boat? 660. had oral sex on a ship (for purposes of this test, a ship is any water based craft over 80 feet in length)? 661. fucked on a ship? 662. necked/petted in an aircraft in flight? 663. had oral sex in an aircraft in flight? 664. fucked in an aircraft in flight? 665. necked/petted on public transportation (bus, subway, tram or trolley)? 666. had oral sex on public transportation? 667. fucked on public transportation? 668. necked/petted in a telephone booth, voting booth, hall closet or other small, non-moving enclosure? 669. had oral sex in a telephone booth, voting booth, hall closet or other small, non-moving enclosure? 670. fucked in a telephone booth, voting booth, hall closet or other small, non-moving enclosure? 671. while in an elevator, or on an escalator or other people mover, necked/petted? 672. in an elevator, on an escalator or other people mover, had oral sex? 673. fucked in an elevator, on an escalator or other people mover? 674. necked/petted on the roof of a building? 675. had oral sex on the roof of a building? 676. fucked on the roof of a building? 677. necked/petted in the snow? 678. had oral sex in the snow? 679. fucked in the snow (now that's fucking cold)? 680. had oral sex out of doors? 681. fucked out of doors? 682. had oral sex in a semi public location where you could be discovered. 683. fucked in a semi public location where you could be discovered?was a possibility of discovery? 684. necked/petted in a public building (i.e. library, town hall, school)? 685. had oral sex in a public building? 686. fucked in a public building? 687. necked/petted in a free flowing body of water (river, lake, pool, ocean)? 688. had oral sex in a free flowing body of water (river, lake, pool, ocean)? 689. fucked in a free flowing body of water (river, lake, pool, ocean)? 690. had sexual activity in a household room other than the bedroom (kitchen, hallway, living room)? 691. had sexual activity on the floor? 692. had sexual activity on a piece of furniture not normally used for resting humans on (i.e. microwave, washing machine, tv, kitchen sink, chest-of-drawers)? 693. showered with a member of the opposite sex in a 'non-coed' facility (locker room, dorm shower, whatever)? 694. had oral sex while showering with a member of the opposite sex in a 'non-coed' facility (locker room, dorm shower, whatever)? 695. fucked while showering with a member of the opposite sex in a 'non-coed' facility (locker room, dorm shower, whatever)? 696. necked/petted in any location with the intention of being discovered? 697. had oral sex in any location with the intention of being discovered? 698. fucked in any location with the intention of being discovered? Section XII. Style (or lack thereof). [78/0] Have you ever: 699. pointed and laughed? 700. eaten any food in a provocative manner (oysters, banana, ice cream)? 701. used a commercial aphrodisiac? 702. taken something to "improve" your performance? 703. accepted sex and now wish you hadn't? 704. turned down sex and now wish you hadn't? 705. didn't think it promiscuous having different partners annually? 706. didn't think it promiscuous having different partners monthly? 707. didn't think it promiscuous having different partners weekly? 708. didn't think it promiscuous having different partners daily? 709. didn't think it promiscuous having different partners in at a time? 710. made or taken a phone call during sexual activity with someone? 711. during sexual activity, had your partner make or take a phone call with their parent, S.O., or other important type person? 712. In either of the above cases, did you/they continue during the call? 713. had a general emergency arise during sexual activity (i.e. flood, fire, hurricane or Norse Stickball)? 714. had a minor emergency during sexual activity (i.e. muscle cramp, asthma attack, somebody at the door, pager/beeper go off)? 715. during sexual activity had any crisis that now causes you great merriment (i.e. the bed broke, couldn't get the condom on)? 716. had nude snapshots taken of you? 717. taken nude snapshots of someone else? 718. given nude snapshots/drawings/other artwork, of yourself to someone? 719. streaked, flashed or otherwise intentionally displayed your bod to the general public (without pay, topless dancing doesn't count)? 720. streaked, flashed or otherwise intentionally displayed your bod to the general public as part of the job (modeling doesn't count)? 721. posed or asked someone else to pose nude or semi nude for private drawings, paintings or photographs as a 'favor'? 722. posed or asked someone else to pose nude or semi nude in public (i.e. art classes) as a 'favor'? 723. posed or asked someone else to pose as a model for purposes of erotic, pornographic or sexually explicit art? 724. posed or asked someone else to asked someone to pose for erotic, pornographic or sexually explicit photographs and there was no film in the camera? 725. engaged in sex for more than three hours in a single session with the same partner? 726. engaged in sex for more than three hours in a single session with multiple partners? 727. had or caused multiple orgasms? 728. had sex until one of you was sore or ran dry? 729. intentionally been bruised or injured during any sexual activity? 730. intentionally bruised or injured someone during any sexual activity? 731. spanked anyone before or during sex? 732. been sore on the morning after? 733. had sex to a piece of music particularly chosen for that occasion. (Blue Danube, I Want your Sex, et. al.) 734. disturbed others with the noise from your sexual activity? 735. been a screamer? 736. fucked dorsally ('doggy' style)? 737. fucked in the female superior position? 738. fucked sitting up? 739. fucked standing up? 740. fucked while still clothed ('down with trousers, up with dresses!')? 741. fallen asleep during sex? 742. talked dirty during sexual activity? 743. fainted as a result of orgasm (give them a stud point!)? [continued on next page] Section XII. Style [continued] 744. had sex before breakfast? 745. had sex instead of lunch (good aerobics and low on calories)? 746. had a 'quickie'? 747. had your partner faint during intercourse or oral sex as a result of orgasm (you stud(dette) you!)? 748. been in intimate contact with more than one nude person at a time? 749. had sex more than five times in twenty four hours? 750. had sex with more than 1 person in a 24 hour time period? 751. gone in public after sex w/o bathing (and you're sure everyone can tell it too)? 751. had sex with both genders in a 24 hour period? 752. had sex with spectators? 753. had a mistress/'kept man' (this is not the d/s Mistress definition)? 754. been a mistress/'kept man'? 755. been involved in a menage-a-trois? 756. invited someone or been invited to be involved in a menage-a-trios? 757. participated in an orgy (four or more people; partners must be exchanged) or similar group activity? 758. made an invitation to join in an orgy or similar group activity? 759. been engaged in sexual activity when the parent or S.O. of either of you returned unexpectedly? 760. been engaged in sexual activity when the parent or S.O. of either of you returned unexpectedly, have them excuse themselves and tell you to continue? 761. been engaged in sexual activity when the parent or S.O. of either of you returned unexpectedly, have them excuse themselves and tell you to continue, and you were able? 762. walked in on your S.O. while they were engaged in sexual activity with someone else? 763. walked in on your S.O. while they were engaged in sexual activity with someone else, excused yourself and left them to continue? 764. walked in on your parents? 765. walked in on others unaware that they were engaged in sexual activity? 766. walked in on others unaware that they were engaged in sexual activity, been asked to join and did so? 767. had others walk in unaware that you were involved in sexual activity and you asked them to join? 768. had others walk in unaware that you were involved in sexual activity and had them ask to join in? 769. initiated sexual activity with a member of the medical profession, not your S.O. (doctor, nurse or therapist)? 770. initiated sexual activity with someone in authority, not your S.O. (your parole officer, psychiatrist, or baby-sitter)? 771. initiated sexual activity with a member of the legal profession, not your S.O. (lawyer, judge, or paralegal)? 772. initiated sexual activity with a member of the academic community, not your S.O. (Professor, instructor, TA)? 773. initiated sexual activity with an intellectual, not your S.O. (librarian, author, essayist, or scribe, scientist)? 774. initiated sexual activity with someone in uniform, not your S.O. (Army, Navy, Marines, Post Office, Cub Scout, Sports figure)? 775. initiated sexual activity with a member of an 'out' group, not your (someone you wouldn't take home to meet the family, i.e. a biker, air head or securities broker)? 776. initiated sexual activity with a religious officiary, not your S.O. (priest/ess, nun, minister, pope, etc. [must be 'ordained'])? Section XIII. Testing (Put away your books; get out your #2 pencils!) [9/0] Have you ever: 777. had an unauthorized crib sheet for a test? 778. lied on a Purity Test to improve you score? 779. done something with the intent to 'improve' your Purity Test scores or used a Test for inspiration? 780. been jealous of/impressed by/scared by someone else's test scores? 781. read a Purity Test aloud, without omitting sections or being embarrassed? 782. administered a group Purity Test? 783. taken a group purity test? 784. written or rewritten a Purity Test? 785. remembered something you had done previously by taking a Purity Test? ---------------------------------------------------------------------------- I. Scoring Congratulations! You are now the proud owner of a sheet of paper containing lots of itty-bitty answers to the Purity Test. Sworn to excellence of workmanship, we now give you directions on how to calculate your SCORE. It would be handy to have a calculator lying around. Remember to only count 1/2 point for each '[1/2 pt]' question. Scoring methods: (Use #1 if you think you have fewer 'Yes' answers; #2 if you think you aren't quite that pure...) 1) Count 'Yes' answers. 2) Count 'no' answers. Subtract that number from 800. Divide the total by 8. Divide the result by 8. The result is your purity percentage. The higher the number, the more pure you are; in the same vein, the lower the score, the more of a sleaze-bag you are. ---------------------------------------------------------------------------- II. Warranty Information We hope that you have enjoyed this test. It does not come with a warranty, nor does it guarantee that it will get you laid or make you somehow somewhat better in bed or the haystack. The makers of this test are not responsible for any liabilities or damages resulting from this test, including but not limited to paternity suits. Ask your doctor or pharmacist. Do not open back panel; no user serviceable parts inside. Propagate (this test) at will, even without the written permission of the publisher; just don't edit or change it. In reproducing this test, the authors of this test may exercise droit de seigneur over you, your immediate family, or fiance(e). You may or may not have additional rights which may vary from state to state (i.e. inebriated, ecstasy, confusion). Not recommended for children under twelve. Parental guidance discouraged & frowned upon. Pencils, additional paper, and batteries not included. Some assembly may be required. Does not come with any other figures. ---------------------------------------------------------------------------- Drive carefully; 90% of the people in the world are caused by accidents. The above is a public service announcement of the institutionalized. ----------------------------------------------------------------------------