From news.spc.edu!news.new-york.net!news.columbia.edu!panix!news.bbnplanet.com!cam-news-hub1.bbnplanet.com!uunet!in3.uu.net!192.54.253.23!fugue.clari.net!funny-request Fri Dec 20 01:42:21 1996 Xref: news.spc.edu rec.humor.funny:6935 Newsgroups: rec.humor.funny Organization: Students Improving Campus Online Services From: brianm@server.berkeley.edu (Brian Markenson) Subject: Net is Slow (sung to the tune of Let it Snow) Keywords: topical, smirk, computers Approved: funny-request@clari.net Path: news.spc.edu!news.new-york.net!news.columbia.edu!panix!news.bbnplanet.com!cam-news-hub1.bbnplanet.com!uunet!in3.uu.net!192.54.253.23!fugue.clari.net!funny-request Message-ID: Date: Thu, 19 Dec 96 3:20:02 EST Lines: 38 Inspired by Sprintlink's service, and written by 3 very creative guys: (apologies to whoever wrote the real song) Oh, the network outside is frightful, But on campus, it's so delightful, Our packets have nowhere to go, Net is slow, net is slow, net is slow. It doesn't show signs of stopping, All our packets, our hosts are dropping; Bandwidth is turned way down low, Net is slow, net is slow, net is slow. When we finally connect to a site, It's time to go back to the dorm; But if I could stay here all night, I could submit their Web form. The network is slowly dying, And, I fear, we're still denying, But as long as Sprint is the way to go, Net is slow, net is slow, net is slow. -(new lyrics by kube, bhchan, ekim, & norby) kube@csua.berkeley.edu bhchan@csua.berkeley.edu ekim@csua.berkeley.edu norby@csua.berkeley.edu -- Selected by Jim Griffith. MAIL your joke to funny@clari.net. Attribute the joke's source if at all possible. A Daemon will auto-reply. Send comments meant for the moderator to funny-request@clari.net. Jokes sent to this address will be ignored. For the full submission guidelines, see http://comedy.clari.net/rhf/